Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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