Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Alive.
So much puke
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
