Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize
