i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
