i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Just took my morning after pill in the library
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
