I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Randomize