goodnight i made you a song goodbye
he shaved USA in his pubs
i love accidental penises.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Randomize
