what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
