3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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