Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize