Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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