Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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