I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
