It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Is it penis luge time yet?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
