do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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