is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
