I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
50% drunk capacity currently
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
