I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
me + whiskey = a bad person
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
