just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
