If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize