i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
