I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize