Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
