His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
