the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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