I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
