Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
