apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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