Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize
