how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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