I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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