Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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