it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
the raccoons are back...
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