his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
