We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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