Are we in a gay sports bar?
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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