Can Purell be used as lube?
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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