I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
