i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
