the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
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