I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I have fence marks all over my body
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
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