shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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