you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I currently don't understand fingers.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
