...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize