Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
my sisters under your porch take her home
they're like a gay fantastic four
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
