you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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