I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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