We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
