Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize