This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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