That's intense
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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