Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
